Marriage is hard enough in good times - but what about the bad times? Can your marriage survive the difficult times?

We all go through them – death or illness in the family, natural disasters, financial strains, problems with your children. Will you be able to hold on to each other, or could a marriage in the crisis time escalate into a marriage crisis?

Your marriage doesn't have to fall apart. There are things you can do to get ready for bad times

and deal with them.

Prepare for a natural disaster before it happens.

Don’t assume it can never happen to you. Develop a plan to handle emergencies. Having an emergency plan will help you feel more in control. Know how you’ll get your family out if there’s a fire – you might even want to try having occasional fire drills. Are you in a flood plain? How will you handle rising water? Set up an emergency food and water supply.

All these things will help you feel more prepared and help you and your spouse work as a team. When you can depend on each other you'll be able to maintain a good marriage in a crisis.

Don’t blame each other for the situation.

There is a tendency for each spouse to blame the other in some crisis situations, especially those involving your children. Blaming your spouse or blaming yourself makes it hard to deal with the actual situation. You're expending so much energy in blaming or avoiding blame you have no energy left for the crisis.

Blaming doesn’t solve anything – and blaming your spouse actually makes you the victim. Blaming just increases the pressure. Try to stay in control of your own emotions. Try to understand where your spouse is coming from.

You can get through this together, but only if you support each other. Imagine a rowboat where two people are rowing in opposite directions – you won’t get too far down the river that way. You have to work together to make any progress.

Don’t sweat the small stuff.

Try to lower your expectations about the mundane functions of everyday life. The important thing now is to support each other. If you’re used to cooking gourmet meals every night, try to simplify the menu. If the housekeeping has to slide a little for a day or two it won’t be the end of the world.

If possible, consider hiring outside help or asking friends to help you instead of expecting your spouse to pick up the slack. If you don’t give extra work to each other you may be able to rely on your spouses’ support during the difficult times.

Keep communications open.

Make sure you communicate with your spouse. Try to speak on a calm voice and use supportive words instead of harsh language. Speak to your spouse as you would like your spouse to speak to you.

If communications break down a marriage in a crisis can quickly turn into a marriage crisis, or even grounds for a divorce. Try to be open-minded when having discussions and listen to what your spouse is actually saying. Above all else, be able to forgive and move on if there are any issues with miscommunication.

Approach the situation together.

A marriage in a crisis time needs both of you united as a couple. You need to work together in order to get through the trauma. You need to make decisions together, and support each other as you're working them out.

You and your spouse started a life together in love. You may even have vowed to stay united "for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health". Whatever the current situation is, your love can bring you through it, as long as you work together.